


Changes in Attitudes

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Children, F/M, Family, Friendship, Romance, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-08-30
Updated: 2007-08-30
Packaged: 2019-05-15 15:51:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14793441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: CJ and Danny tell the Bartlet Bunch about the new baby





	Changes in Attitudes

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

  
Author's notes:

CJ/Danny; Josh/Donna; many other West Wingers

 

 

 

Rating Adult -

 

 

 

Spoilers through end of series

 

 

 

Not mine, never were, never will be, but they consume my soul

 

 

 

Feedback and criticism always welcomed

* * *

_Thursday, April 26, 2012; Washington, DC_

“Good afternoon. I’m Claudia Concannon. I’m meeting Reverend Reeves for lunch?”

“Of course, Madame,” the maître d’hotel smiled with Gallic charm. “Dr. Reeves is already waiting for you at the table. If you will come with me.”

CJ followed the tuxedoed man as he led her through the old townhouse turned French bistro, leaving the foyer, traversing first one small dining room, then another, finally entering the enclosed sun porch.

CJ smiled as she spotted the minister and Paul returned her smile, gracefully standing as she approached. The two exchanged one armed hugs and light cheek kisses; then the maître de seated CJ and asked about beverages.

“CJ?” Paul looked at his first love.

“Seltzer with lime.”

“Seltzer with lime for the lady,” Paul repeated her order to the man, “and unsweetened iced tea for me.”

“I’m so glad we have this time to talk, to catch up,” CJ told Paul. “I know you’ll be at Rick and Ginger’s tomorrow night, but it will be a huge crowd. Anyway, how’re the kids? Excited about next month?”

“Excited, apprehensive, a little sad to be ending this phase of their lives.”

Derrick and Deborah would be graduating from Oberlin and Miami of Ohio, respectively, in May. Derrick had chosen the University of Washington School of Law over Ohio State, Villanova, and Boston University. Deborah had been accepted to the graduate schools of Journalism at Florida, Michigan, and Massachusetts, but as soon as she got the letter from Columbia, her dream for the past four years, her decision was made.

“And how are you feeling about this?”

“Excited, apprehensive, a little sad to see this phase of their lives ending.” Paul laughed. “Prouder than you can ever imagine, wishing that Alicia could be here to see them recognized for this milestone in their lives. Both of them are graduating _magna_ , with Deborah missing _summa_ by just a few hundredths of a point. I’ll be in Ohio for most of May.”

The waiter brought their beverages, recited the specials (chilled cream of cucumber soup; a spinach salad with choice of crab, grilled chicken, or steak; a shrimp quiche; grilled swordfish à la grecque; filet mignon with bordelaise sauce), and asked if they needed more time. (They each ordered a cup of the soup, but decided they did need more time for the rest of their meal.)

CJ’s cell rang.

“Excuse me a second, it’s Danny.”

She made the conversation brief, then rang off with her husband.

“The papal nuncio will be in New York tomorrow, Danny has a lunch time meeting with him, so instead of coming down on Amtrak, he’ll be checking a shuttle out of La Guardia, but he’ll still be here by 4:30. He says ‘hi’ and congratulations on the kids, will talk more with you tomorrow night. Told me to break a leg in front of the Senate tomorrow morning.”

When CJ was asked to testify for the Foreign Relations committee on what “Road to a Better World” had learned about giving aid and how that experience might benefit the United States, Danny decided to plan a consulting visit with his publisher at the same time. They left Paddy in Frank and Diana’s care and flew into DC on Tuesday night, staying with Rick and Ginger for this trip. After a morning visit at the _Post_ , Danny took the train to New York Wednesday afternoon.

The waiter came back; Paul relayed their orders (chicken piccata and salad for CJ, the swordfish with salad for him). The minister was a little surprised that CJ hadn’t chosen the swordfish. As he remembered from their time together in California, it was one of her favorites.

“And how is Paddy?”

“Just fine, if he doesn’t kill us by trying to kill himself.”

CJ told Paul of an incident last week.

“He couldn’t find his little scissors, but knew that there was a pair on the bookshelves in the den. Danny puts them up there precisely to keep them out of Paddy’s reach. So Paddy moves Danny’s rolling desk chair next to the book shelves, then a hassock next to the chair. He climbs the hassock, then onto the chair seat. The next step is the shelf that is at the level of the back of the chair, then up one more shelf, when he can reach the shelf that has Danny’s scissors, so he’s climbing the bookcase as if it were the face of a cliff.

“However, he needs both hands to get back down, so he puts the scissors between his teeth, with the pointed ends inside his mouth, and begins to climb down. That’s how Danny and I find him.

“Danny gets there a split second before I do, grabs him, pulls out the scissors, and throws them to the floor. I’m there and take Paddy out of Danny’s arm just as Danny pulls back his hand, so I end up getting the swat Danny intended for Paddy’s butt on **my** arm. Later, Danny and I have a discussion. We had talked this out before, that we would never say ‘never’ to spanking, but that it would be for something extremely dire. Danny tells me that a single smack to reinforce avoiding a dangerous situation given to a child too young to listen to reason does not constitute a spanking.”

Paul told CJ that he agreed with Danny.

“And so would have Alicia. She swatted the kids’ fannies when they were toddlers, but if you were to ask them, I’m sure they would say that they really didn’t remember that.”

Paul asked after their neighbors and CJ told him about the new babies and other news. As she talked, he watched her, thinking that, in one sense, she was so much more beautiful now than she was back in Berkeley in the early ‘80’s. The poise, the self-confidence, and the maturity had a good deal to do with it, of course, but those qualities had been there the times he had seen her between that chance meeting in Dulles almost three years ago. There was something else there today, he mused.

Then he put it together. She was drinking something not only non-alcoholic but also non-caffeinated. She didn’t order the swordfish. She ate a piece of bread, something she rarely did, but didn’t use any butter. She had always been animated, but her eyes were glowing even more than he remembered, and there was an aura of anticipation around her.

He smiled at her. “Sweetheart, are you pregnant?”

She blushed slightly, looked down at her plate, then met his eyes and smiled.

“How did you know?”

He picked up her hand, lightly kissed it. It may have been three decades ago, but he had spent almost two years with her in physical and emotional intimacy. I know you, sweetheart, he said to himself.

“I’m so happy for the two of you! Danny must be floating six inches off the ground! So, when? Boy or girl?”

“November, right around my birthday. We want to be surprised again, and all we want is a healthy baby, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that a little girl would be nice. No one here knows, Danny is so excited about making the announcement tomorrow at the party.” The unspoken request to not only keep the secret but to also not let Danny know that Paul had figured out the secret was understood.

They halted the conversation as the waiter brought their salads and went through the pepper mill ritual (Paul never understood why restaurants made such a deal about the pepper mill. It wasn’t as if the spice were that rare, that the mechanics of the grinder were that esoteric, or the skill to operate it that specialized.)

“I’m so glad that you’re so happy, sweetheart.”

“Sometimes, I have to convince myself that all this is real. Paul, there were so many times when I thought that all this had passed out of my reach. I would remember that second October and almost wish,” CJ stopped, her eyes becoming just a little moist.

Paul reached across the table and took her hand. He too remembered that time. CJ had been sick, a really bad cold that turned into strep throat. He brought her to the apartment, arranged to have someone cover for him at his job, and, except for his classes and his study group, spent his free time taking care of her. Her recuperation was slow, and she ended up spending pretty much the whole month at the apartment.

When her period didn’t come at the end of the month as she expected, she wasn’t concerned at first. It was not uncommon for it to happen sometimes with the pills, she had been told when she first went to Student Health a year ago. However, that weekend, when they had invited her roommate Alex and Luke, the guy that Paul thought would be good for Alex, to dinner, Luke mentioned something he learned while volunteering at the free clinic earlier in the week. A woman didn’t know she was pregnant, insisted that she had never missed a pill.

“It turns out that antibiotics can affect the efficacy of the pills; that she should have used backup after she had been treated for an ear infection,” Luke told the others.

That night, CJ quaked in Paul’s arms. Back then, more time was required between the missed period and the first use of the at-home tests in order avoid a false negative. He kept telling her that they would deal with it together, whatever “it” was.

Paul didn’t tell her that his mind was already making contingency plans. He looked at the jewelry ads, determining how much ring he could afford with the current balance in his “CJ” account. He made surreptitious inquiries about extra weekend work, resigned himself to quitting the law school rugby club, checked out how much child care would be at the married students’ co-op, grateful that she would be able to finish out the current year and recover in time for the start of her senior year and his final year of law school. He planned what he would tell her father. He looked into a low-cost trip to Mexico for a short honeymoon trip over Christmas break.

When the time came to do the test, it came back negative, but she didn’t fully relax until she did have her period the next time.

Her voice brought him back to the present.

“I remember, about three months after we married, when I woke up with proof that I wasn’t pregnant, that I wondered if God was getting back at me for”

“He doesn’t work that way, CJ, you know that!” Paul interrupted her. Then he smiled at her. “But, you know, there was a small part of me that was a little disappointed when everything came back negative. I had figured out how to make it all work, you and me and the baby, being married that final year in school. You know, I never even considered that if you had been pregnant, you might have wanted to get rid”

In the end, I don’t think I could have,” she smiled back at him. “Even if you had washed your hands of me,” she put up her other hand to forestall his indignation that she would have thought for even one second that he would have done so, “I probably would have arranged for Randy and Gina to take care of it for me while I finished undergrad, then figured out something for grad school. But I guess it wasn’t in God’s plans.”

“You know, CJ, I’m not really sure how often God has plans for us. Or, rather, I think that He has many different scenarios and allow us to choose one. I’m sure that if you had been pregnant, that we would have had a good life together, a good marriage. I’m sure that if Alicia had stayed at Yale, instead of marrying me, that she would have found someone else and also had a fulfilling life, and I’m sure that the same would have held true for Danny. Now, whether or not Jed Bartlet would have become president without your help, I don’t know. Whether I would have been as good a lawyer as I am a minister, I don’t know. I don’t know everything about what would have happened if you hadn’t walked away from me because you were scared, but – CJ?” He stopped, seeing the stricken look on her face.

“That’s what I did, isn’t it?” she reflected. “That’s what I almost did with Danny; those are the words he used. ‘It’s okay to be scared, but you’re not going to walk away from me because you’re scared. I’m not that scary.’ At least, by the time he came into my life, I learned,” she laughed.

"CJ, was **I** that scary?" he asked her softly.

CJ looked at him, saw the minute glimmer of hurt in his eyes. She shook her head slowly from side to side, silently formed the word "no", and smiled.

His innate sense of courtesy lightened the moment, not wanting to cause her any discomfort.

“So maybe I should have been more insistent?” Paul laughed.

The waiter came with their main courses and they kept quiet while he served them and checked to see what else he might do for them. CJ and Paul each took a few bites in silence.

“You want to hear something maybe eerie?” CJ asked. “About a month before our wedding, Danny told me that when he was weighing his options, when he knew he didn’t want to be a political, investigative reporter any more, when he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do, one of the things he considered was a late in life vocation to the priesthood. So I might have lost a second man to God. But Danny also said that, after talking with his friend Tim, he figured that -”

“He could handle celibacy, but the obedience thing would be the real kicker,” Paul finished her thoughts. “You know, I’ve met several Catholic men who’ve said that. For me, I don’t know if I could have managed the hard parts of ministry without Alicia there for comfort and support when I needed it.”

“Which is why I still think you need a woman in your life. You **do** , Paul,” she reiterated. “I was with you for almost two years, and I know how much better you were, how easier it was for you, grade-wise, work-wise, being a boyfriend-wise, everything-wise, when you got me in bed with you after two months.”

“And the fact that it took me a while to get used to law school, to Berkeley, had nothing to do with it? I freely admit that having you with me, having you love me, made those years as close to perfect as possible, but CJ, sweetheart, please don’t start meddling again.”

“Well, maybe the acclimation played a role, and I’m not going to meddle. But promise me that you’ll be open to the idea that God may have someone in mind for you, that God may have more plans for you.”

“As the kids would say, ‘Well, duh!’. But let’s get back to you. Are you doing okay with the pregnancy? Morning sickness? Your work, traveling, the pressure?”

They finished their entrées, decided to split a slice of cheesecake, and had coffee (decaf for her). The waiter brought the check (she knew better than to try to pay for the meal), and filled their cups, then came back to do so two more times. It was only when they noticed that the wait staff was putting out wine glasses on all the tables around them that they realized they had spent most of the afternoon together, talking about so many different things. It was exactly like that first time at Berkeley.

“Ginger is going to think I dropped off the face of the earth!” CJ exclaimed as Paul helped her from her chair and they walked outside the restaurant. He apologized for not being able to take her to Ginger and Rick’s (“I’m hosting the steering committee meeting for the Ecumenical Charities Organization in 30 minutes”), signaled for a cab, gave the driver the address, along with twenty-five dollars. She started to protest that she could pay her own cab fare, but stopped, realizing that Danny would have done the same thing had he been lunching with Chris or Katie. CJ reached up to kiss his cheek, received one in return, and shouted, “See you tomorrow night!” as the cab accelerated.

On the short trip to her hosts’ townhouse, CJ reflected that she was glad that she and Paul had worked through the emotional issues that had sprung up between them as their renewed relationship found its way to its new comfort level. He would always be special to her, more special than any other man except Danny. Now, if only he would find a woman. In spite of his protests, she knew him. It wasn’t just that he was much happier when he was getting laid regular, although that was no small consideration; Paul Reeves was born to make a woman happy and he was happiest when he was doing so. She would keep her promise not to try to find someone for him, but, then, they hadn’t discussed her lighting candles, making a novena, or praying to whoever the patron saint for men looking for wives was. (She’d check with Fr. Luke; if push came to shove, there was always St. Valentine, she guessed).

As Paul drove back to his rectory, he found himself wondering what God’s repertoire of scenarios had held back in 2006 right after Alicia had died.

What if he hadn’t gone off to the missions but had taken the position with the NCC here in Washington that had been offered to him? Would he have looked up CJ? Now that he knew how lonely she had been at the time, with everyone having deserted her, would he and she have been of comfort to each other? And when Danny Concannon came back into her life, whom would she have chosen? Ah, well, you know what they say about “ifs and ands” he told himself.

That evening, at dinner, Rick told CJ and Ginger that the navy would be commissioning the USS Fitzwallace right after Independence Day in New London. Ginger decided to schedule the annual Bartlet Bunch reunion for that time and to hold it at the big old house in Newport. She would call the management company tomorrow, to make sure it was closed to public touring during that time.

After dinner, while Ginger was overseeing the older kids’ homework, Donna called for CJ. She would be in the Senate committee room when CJ gave her testimony. Could they have lunch afterward? Donna had cleared her schedule for tomorrow. There were so many topics on which the two of them had to catch up and there wouldn’t be time to do so at the party.

CJ checked with Ginger, who told her to go, relax, just be back by 7:00, when the first guests were due to arrive for the buffet supper and the party.

_Friday, April 27, 2012_

“Donna, it’s really nice of you to take off the whole day to be with me. Here, you have some more of the antipasto.”

Today, lunch was in an Italian restaurant.

“Actually, it’s not the whole day. Nancy wanted me to sit in on your testimony and take good notes, give her my synopsis. You never can tell how things can get garbled by the time a congressional committee publishes its findings,” Donna laughed. “CJ, are you sure you don’t want some of this wine? Josh calls it an Italian Pinot Noir. It’s very good.”

When her companion refused the offer, Donna put together the fact that CJ wasn’t drinking wine and that she wasn’t eating any of the “to die for” soft mozzarella on the antipasto platter. Only Donna didn’t ask the question; she stated the fact.

“You’re pregnant.”

“First Paul, and now you. So much for making the big announcement tonight.” CJ shyly smiled at her friend.

“I’m so happy for you!” Donna jumped up and hugged CJ, then returned to her seat. “I know you’ve been trying for a year. So, when? Does anyone else know?” Donna didn’t bother asking about sex. She and CJ had had this discussion before today; both of them liked the idea of not knowing, of being surprised.

CJ gave her the details. “Nancy and Bonnie know, and Diana, but they’re sworn to secrecy. We’re having a small party on Monday when we’ll tell the rest of the block. Danny was really looking forward to springing the news on everyone tonight,” she gave Donna a pleading look.

“Well, it’s safe with me, and I know it’s safe with Paul. And before you ask, I won’t say a word to Josh.”

After they finished the antipasto, they ordered plates of radiatori primavera with white wine sauce (“Make sure all the alcohol is cooked away,” CJ told the waiter), and nibbled on breadsticks while awaiting the pasta.

“So tell me about everything, the job, the kids, school, Josh.”

“The job is amazing. Right now, Nancy has me working with David on the East European desk, but I’m also shadowing the Undersecretary for Foreign Aid, which is why she wanted me to be there during your testimony. I usually make it home from Foggy Bottom by 8:00PM. Sometimes Josh and the kids beat me home, sometimes I beat them home. I’ve got a webcam set up on my PC at work so I can look in on my babies at the White House day care. Next month, I’m going with Nancy to Prague.

“The triplets are all walking now and keeping up with them and Noah is all the workout I need. Joannie talks the most, but Micah has the best vocabulary – I’m sure he’s channeling Danny. Noah takes his duties as big brother very seriously; he’s trying to get them toilet-trained, would you believe?”

(CJ smiled slightly; Paddy had finally experienced that moment of realization when everything clicked last month. She remembered how excited he was when Danny called and put the little boy on the phone. “I poop in pot, Mama!” And when she got home that afternoon, the child met her at the door from the garage into the courtyard holding the pot in both hands. “I save to show you, Mama!” That night, Danny told her that he didn’t know how to tell their son that Mama really didn’t need to see it.)

“Anyway, they continue to develop their own personalities, to differentiate themselves. According to Mrs. Santos, the day care folks say that Leo is a real leader in the group. Not that he runs everything, Amy’s assistant’s little girl does that, but he’s the one that the others turn to for resolving issues among themselves.

“As far as school goes, twenty-seven credits down, twenty-one more to go. That includes the thesis. I’m only doing one class this summer instead of two, but I should finish up by spring of ’14, just in time for us to leave the White House.” Donna was pursuing a Master’s in Public Policy at Georgetown’s Public Policy Institute. “I think I’m looking at two A’s this term.” (CJ remembered that for last year, last summer, and this fall, Donna had a 3.5 – four A’s and four A minuses. CJ felt a bit of pride that Danny was doing better, grade wise, not that she had anything to do with it, she realized.)

“How is Josh dealing with all of this?” CJ knew that Josh was totally supportive, in theory, of Donna’s endeavors, both in the classroom and in the workplace, but it was sometimes hard to reconcile Joshua Lyman, supportive husband with the Deputy Chief of Staff whose method of dealing with any issue, from his lunch order to a major bureaucratic snafu, was to shout, at the top of his voice, “Donn – naahh!”

“Better than I expected, especially after his mother died. That was really rough. Of course, I made sure that we had plenty of support, with two live-in _au pairs_ and a twice-weekly cleaning service. And the work-life improvements that Mrs. Santos is implementing are a great help. One of the girls drives with him to the White House with the kids and helps with getting them to the daycare before she goes off to school.”

They finished their lunch and left the restaurant (Donna had finessed her for the check; apparently she and Josh had an account with the establishment), with Donna once again promising to not tell Josh about the baby and to act properly surprised when Danny made the announcement at the party that evening.

CJ returned to Rick and Ginger’s, checked in with her hostess, and decided to nap for a while. She had just put her head on the pillow when the bedroom door opened and Danny entered.

“So I guess my plans for a nap are on hold,” she smiled at her husband.

Danny sat down on the bed and kissed her, then pulled away.

“Your health and Minnow II’s health are more important than my horniness; you want to nap, we’ll nap. I’ll put my husbandly rights to your body on ice.” Danny got off the bed, removed his sweater, and began to unzip his khakis.

“Literally?” CJ asked, looking at the mini-refrigerator in their room (Ginger thought of everything) and then at Danny’s groin.

“Note to Scott Winkler. Doctor, is it okay to spank my wife when she’s pregnant?”

Forty-five minutes later, he woke up to her kisses on his eyes and her hands inside his boxers. She murmured against his face as her kisses trailed down to the bare skin of his neck.

“CJ’s horny; CJ wants Danny.”

“CJ wants Danny what?”

“CJ wants Danny hard.”

“CJ wants Danny hard what?”

“CJ wants Danny hard inside her.”

“CJ wants Danny hard inside her what?”

She finally remembered what Danny had been drilling into Paddy for the past month.

“CJ wants Danny hard inside her, please?”

Danny stripped off her panties, stripped off his boxers, and buried himself within her. For a second, he wondered how long he would have been able to hold off; then his thoughts shifted solely to what he was doing to her and what she was doing to him.

Afterward, as they lay in the bed in contented afterglow, she told him of her lunches.

“So, I figure it won’t hurt to light a few candles for Paul; it amazes me that he’s done without for over six years. When I remember what he was like after only four days - ”.

What amazed Danny was that he could lie there, listening to CJ talk about another man’s prowess in bed and not be upset, concerned, or anxious. Why was he so comfortable with Paul, who had been as close, sexually, with CJ then as he himself was with her now, while he still was so uncomfortable with Toby, who had never touched his wife intimately? Why, in spite of Aisling’s and Sorcha’s reassurances, was he still concerned about one Tobias Zachary Ziegler?

Speaking of Toby, Danny was glad that he hadn’t told CJ that the Columbia instructor had flown down with him this afternoon. When the two of them entered the townhouse to find out that CJ was already resting, they conspired with Rick and Ginger to keep his last minute presence for the party a surprise.

“I don’t know, love of my life; maybe you should leave well enough alone. If he says he’s content -”. Danny hoped that he wasn’t being selfish, that he wasn’t wanting Paul to remain unattached just in case Aisling and Sorcha were wrong. Danny still had these premonitions, every once in a blue moon, that he wouldn’t be around to take care of CJ, Paddy, and the new life growing within his wife. And when he did have those feelings, Danny’s concern was more about CJ marrying Toby than it was for his own non-participation in his family’s future.

Then his optimism and his belief in what his niece and her great-great aunt told him reasserted itself, as it usually did, and his mind turned to happier thoughts. CJ’s morning sickness was becoming more predictable and manageable; he was beginning to see signs of second trimester libido spikes. Scott said that she was in excellent health, in better shape than a lot of his late twenties, early thirties mothers-to-be. Paddy and toilet-training had finally come to a meeting of minds. At the end of this semester, he would be “All But Dissertation”. He would be presenting the outline of said dissertation to his advisor and the committee right before Independence Day; if he were lucky, it would be all over except for the shouting (and the actual writing and defense) in July. The Vatican and his publishers were happy with the progress on the Pope’s biography and were willing to let it take a back seat to the dissertation.

Light snoring interrupted his thoughts. CJ was napping again. He set his cell phone clock to give them enough time for a shower before the party, and fell asleep, one arm protectively on the child inside her.

_8:30 PM_

“Congratulations!”

“What wonderful news!”

“All. Right!”

Danny had just announced that he and CJ were expecting a second child in November; everyone was crowding around the two of them, offering their congratulations.

“I’m so happy for you, sweetheart. It’s wonderful news, Danny.” Paul kissed CJ lightly on her cheek, then moved toward Danny, his hand outstretched, as Josh swirled CJ away in a full circle.

Danny looked into the minister’s eyes.

“You knew already, didn’t you? She told you?”

“I guessed. She ordered something with neither alcohol nor caffeine to drink and she passed on the swordfish. And the glow; I’m used to spotting it.”

“I’m so unbelievably happy for you, CJ.” Toby Ziegler’s quiet voice reached Danny’s ears. He saw the bearded, balding man embrace CJ in a huge bear hug, swaying back and forth with her for a few seconds.

“It bothers you, doesn’t it? Toby and CJ,” Paul observed softly to Danny. “And it bothers you that it bothers you.” He subtly nudged Danny away from the rest of the crowd.

“Yeah, it does. And I don’t know why.”

“Do you not trust your wife? You **do** know that she would never even think - ”.

“I trust her implicitly,” Danny interrupted the other man. “And I know as well as **you** do that she would never – Ain’t it a bitch. Here I am all concerned about someone who’s never touched her, and yet, you, who spent more time with her than anyone else except me, I have no problem with you. I keep hoping that Toby and Andy will remarry and every time I hear that there’s no special someone in your life, I feel better about whatever may or may not happen to me in the future. That’s terrible, isn’t it? I shouldn’t be having these feelings.”

“Feelings **are** ; they just exist. You can’t control them. Acting on them, or letting them control your life, now that’s a problem.”

“Hey, Danny, get over here! You too, Paul.” Josh was helping Rick pour champagne for everyone (with a glass of ginger ale for CJ).

“To the newest Bartlet baby!”

Danny and CJ stood arm in arm as the others raised their glasses to the expecting parents.

Slowly, the conversations turned to other topics.

Andy came up to tell CJ that she had heard only good things about her testimony in the morning.

Matt Skinner wanted to know the latest about Glen Walken and Ainsley Hayes. If someone could harness the energy produced by all the wagging Republican tongues, he laughed.

Will and Kate arrived late and blushed at the good-natured teasing. She had just arrived a late session at the UN and Will wanted to meet her at the airport. When the two of them were told the good news about CJ and Danny, another round of cheers and toasting ensued.

Sev, Rick and Ginger’s thirteen year old, came into the party to say hello. He had been to a middle school dance and had just been dropped off by his girlfriend’s father. Exhibiting his innate good manners and easy comfort with his parents’ friends, he congratulated CJ and Danny, made some small talk with the others, then grabbed some hors d’oeuvres, a glass of soda, and retreated to his bedroom.

_Later that evening; Lyman residence_

Donna came into the master bedroom.

“Everyone’s fine, sleeping the sleep of the innocent.”

“Joannie’s fever?”

“All gone, just like Elsbeth said. You know, she’s really good with the kids.”

Donna sat on the side of the bed, leaned over, took the papers from Josh’s hands, and kissed her husband thoroughly.

“You spent a lot of time with Danny,” she commented when they came up for air.

“We talked about a lot of things. When I told him that you and I were planning on a second honeymoon, that Ginger and Rick had volunteered to take the kids for two weeks in August, he offered us the use of their property in California. I was really grateful for his thoughtfulness. But I told him I would have to check with you first. Would you rather go someplace with maids and room service? It’s totally your call, Donnatella.”

“Well, if there are restaurants nearby, and if you either don’t mind dust balls or don’t mind doing the vacuuming, it might be nice. Let’s think about it.”

“Donna, Danny also told me that CJ is thinking about resigning the presidency of “Road to a Better World” when this baby is born. She’s seriously considering being a stay at home mom at least until this new baby is ready for school. Danny’s been told that if he gets his degree next spring, he’s all but guaranteed an assistant professorship at USC and the Annenberg School a year from September. He’ll have full benefits and everything. He says it’s doable and if it’s what CJ wants, he wants it for her.”

“That’s funny, she didn’t mention anything about not working after the baby at lunch - .” Donna stopped, realizing what she had just revealed to Josh.

“She told you and you didn’t tell me?”

“She didn’t tell me; I guessed. And she swore me to secrecy. Besides, it was just for a few hours.”

“Well, okay, I guess.” Josh started playing with the hem of her sleep shirt, sliding his hand under it, slowly inching toward his goal at the top of her legs. He started humming “Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes” as he kissed her neck.

“What brought on **that** song?” Donna relaxed her thighs and snuggled down into the space under Josh’s armpit.

“Just the unbelievableness of it all. Ten years ago, when we were running for reelection, if someone had told me that six years after the end of the Bartlet administration, CJ Cregg would be a soccer mom and Donnatella Moss would be a career professional in the State Department, I would have asked that person what they were smoking.

“I wonder at you, Donnatella Moss Lyman. You amaze me more and more each day, the way you grow into your job every day, the way you care for the kids and me. I love you more and more each day. You’ve changed so much, gotten so good at so much.”

Donna reached up to kiss her husband. “It’s not just me, it’s all the West Wing female alumni. Look at Margaret; Leo would be so proud. And Ginger, turned into a gracious wife and mother who hasn’t let her good fortune take her away from her friends. Bonnie and Nancy are doing so much more with “Road” than they did here. And, if she wanted it, Carol could easily be the next Mrs. Landingham.”

“Alumnae.”

“What?”

“The feminine plural of alumnus is alumnae. But I don’t want to spend the next twenty minutes teaching you Latin.” Josh lifted his upper body off the bed and proceeded to show Donna exactly how he did want to spend those twenty minutes. (Actually, he took closer to thirty-five.)

_About the same time; Hoynes residence_

“Yes, right there!”

John Hoynes pressed harder on Margaret’s right shoulder blade. He was straddling her back, just below her waist, massaging away the tension that was keeping his wife from sleep. Her cell had rung at 9:50, in the middle of the party; a tornado had struck in western Kansas. There had been no loss of life, praise God, but there was quite a bit of damage and the governor wanted to make sure that FEMA would be there as soon as possible. Trying to deal with that bureaucracy on a Friday night via telephone had given Margaret an aching head, neck, and back. John thanked God that she hadn’t needed to leave Rick and Ginger’s in order to handle the situation.

“Will you have to go in tomorrow?” He bent down to kiss the place where her neck met her back.

“Just for a little bit, maybe ten to noon. I should be back in plenty of time for the picnic at Carol and David’s. By the way, what were you and CJ talking about so earnestly?”

“Various things. Teething, for one. She told me about chilled teething rings. She also started to tell me about drops of whiskey on gums, then remembered we don’t keep liquor in the house and spent ten minutes apologizing, just rambling on and on. She also told me that it may be possible to have too many onesies, but that she never figured out how many was too many. We also laughed about what we would have said ten years ago if someone told the then Vice-President and the then White House Press Secretary that one day they would be trading child care hints. She still can’t believe that I’m taking care of the baby while you help Matt Santos run the free world.”

As John Hoynes continued to work his magic on his wife’s back, he reflected that he and CJ Cregg Concannon were finally finding a comfortable place in which to rest their relationship, to deal with their history. Paul Reeves had told him that God usually gives you the wherewithal to handle whatever life throws at you, if you stop, think, pray, and listen; and John had taken that wisdom to heart. After nine years, he was content with his life. He accepted responsibility for his mistakes, the ones that cost him the final years of his Vice-Presidency and a sure succession to Jed Bartlet, accepted the loss of the nomination to Matt Santos; he also didn’t dwell on those mistakes but instead looked to a future, reveling in the second chance he had been given. He thanked God every day for Margaret and for Hoop, vowed to be a good husband and father to his son, a good stepfather to Bruno Gianelli’s son, a good counselor to the President.

A soft snore disrupted his thoughts. He had hoped to make love with Margaret but his wife needed her rest. He willed his libido into quiescence, one more thing he could not have imagined himself doing ten years ago.

_About the same time; brownstone of Paul Reeves_

Paul closed his Bible and clasped his hands in prayer. He thanked God for the grace of another day, asked for His blessing for his children, his father-in-law, his brother and his brother’s family, for all his friends. He prayed for world peace and for an increased awareness of concern for the environment.

As he moved from his chair to his bed, he picked up his wife’s picture and, as usual, ran his fingers over her face.

“It’s going to be rough tomorrow, Lissy. Every funeral reminds me of yours. Every wedding reminds me of ours. So many brides over the years, and none of them could hold a candle to you. I’ll never stop loving you.”

Then Paul lay down, shut off the bedside lamp, and fell asleep missing the woman he would only hold again when God called him to heaven.

_Saturday April 28; 3:30 AM_

“Here you go, darling.”

Danny wiped CJ’s face with the damp wash cloth and smoothed back the hair from her face.

“Let me help you.”

Danny put his arms around CJ’s waist and pulled her from the bathroom floor.

“Here’s your toothbrush. Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t want to go to the emergency room?”

“Danny, it’s just morning sickness! A little early, to be sure, but it **is** morning!”

He gave her one of his looks, like the one he gave Paddy when the little boy pulled up the gerbera daisies that had just been planted by the fountain in the center of the courtyard.

“Okay, I did overdo it. But you know how much I love Old Bay shrimp!”

“Just be careful tomorrow, or, rather, later today, at Carol and David’s. For me and for Minnow II.”

“Yes, sir.”

CJ allowed him to help her back into bed.

“Maybe I should ask Paul to talk to you tomorrow. You listen to him.” Danny pulled her back against his groin as they moved into their spooning postures.

“He won’t be able to be there. He actually has four weddings and a funeral, starting at 9:30 in the morning and ending at 8:00 PM, then he’ll put in an appearance at the last wedding’s reception. Luckily, there’s a visiting missionary taking all the Sunday services. Didn’t he say good-bye?”

“No, actually, I got into that deep discussion with Josh and then when Paul came over to thank Josh for seeing that his father-in-law was invited to the thing that President Santos did for Paterno in March, I started talking with Margaret about the tornado, and then Matt Skinner, Eric, Toby and I got into a baseball argument."

“Danny, thank you so much for dragging Toby down here. And thank you for not letting me walk away from you five years ago.”


End file.
